beautiful intricate

there is this light i hardly know
it flickers at a distance for me to see
when i reach out it strays away
just to inch closer when i close my eyes

i know that i trust more than i should
it's a flaw my mother always points out
i am being led to my own demise
like everyone is out to cut my down

but what do i care, i like the twinkle in your eyes
the way your shirt rests easy on your body
when the sun shines down you soak it in
your trembling hands on your careful legs

opinions just frustrate me to no end
but why do i care, really why do i care
i am losing sleep staring at the lonely moon
trying in vain to understand its perpetual glow

my hair is never the way i want it to be
and i am slowly losing interest in who i am not
this shirt it is old but it smells like home
my dry hands holding my shaking legs

i am learning from all that i happen to see
wondering about all that i am yet to see
i am not who i was years and years ago
back when i was unaware but unmistakably happy

now i worry too much about every little thing
even though i know nobody gives a shit
i would let my mind wander if i could let it astray
but it stays chained to my brain and my thoughts they remain

my heart sings melodies that i can't place on my tongue
beautiful intricate pieces you will never get to hear
nobody deserves to listen to it, especially not me
with my blind trust, uncertainty, still searching

i am getting older but the road has just began
it is a straight barren road yet i am always lost
so i follow any light from any single source
ever so confusing but i am the epitome of hope

hopeful that i will see the light i hardly know
let it settle in my hands at a distance i will find
and when i finally do lay to rest
i will not care anymore