when i am going fast, really really fast
i like to stay steady as i stay the course
because if i ever stop i get the urge to lay down
shut down all my emotions and feelings
let the colours change and pass on by
because i will never feel again
like the moment when my eyes get heavy
the cold unforgiving floor calling me home
my body goes limp along with my strength
as my eyes close i feel no shame
let the colours fade but stay the same
because i can never care again
the morning comes with the brightest hues
but all i see is the blackest of blacks
you see, as much as i did not want to close my eyes
i have become satisfied with all my complacency
the feelings and emotions and all of my pain
to be washed away with the retreating tide
it would be lovely but i know i am not that strong
so the colours were never there
but here i sit with my paintbrush and blank canvas
ready to see where my eyes take me today
